I watched as our little, barely walking toddler walked away from us in a busy department store. I followed behind, hiding behind racks, to see if he would get scared and turn around. Nope. Did not turn once. Just waddled away. I had to race and grab him from behind once he stepped onto the escalator.
It was then that I really understood the need for those leashes. Had a talk with the wife and we decided against it, but it was close.
🤣🤣🤣
I’m sure it was very real moment for you. I hope, therefore, that it wasn’t too cruel of me to laugh very loudly at the whole situation. Kids are… Special.
So many people on this thread are defending leashes, yet they don’t exist anywhere but in the US, so…
I have never ever seen a kid leash in Denmark or any country I have visited, and yet kids here don’t run around in stores acting out or disappearing.
I don’t know, they seem dehumanizing and humiliating to me. If other countries can raise kids (incl kids on the spectrum) without them why can’t the US?
My guess is that the American working system has drained so much from their working population that leashes are required because they have no energy left to pay full attention to their children.
That, and streets are deadly hellscapes over there a lot of the time. Driving laws are barely enforced and infrastructure is almost like it’s intended to kill anyone who dares to exist outside a car.
My grandma was a disabled stay-at-home mom with a hyperactive daughter who tended to run away and wreak havoc, and all the police would soon know who to return her to. Grandma was scolded by neighbors for using a leash but able to explain herself. This was in 1970s Czechoslovakia.
They used to be quite common in the UK back in the 80s. Stops kids running into busy roads, and you can also use it to hold up an unsteady toddler.
Obviously you don’t use them on like eight year olds.
You don’t see them much any more.
I’ve seen it once in Denmark actually. But it was a severely mentally challenged kid on a train station where the parents had them in a leash. Looked weird when you’re not used to it, but I guess I can understand that one use case.
Yea, I don’t get it. Reading this thread, the people seem insane to me. Yet they are all 100% up arrows.
It’s fuckin wild. I used to manage a toys department in an American burger big box store in a small town so I saw some shit. It’s either parents with kids on leashes or threatening them or hitting them in the aisle, my fellow Americans often treat their kids like shit, the image of the overindulgent parent isn’t really what you see around. Kids get treated like this and grow up to be adults who don’t break the cycle.
They weren’t uncommon in the US in the '90s, they fell out of favor soon after. Even back then they weren’t popular.
In the '80s and earlier, corporal punishment was regular and expected. There was a push in the '90s to stop the corporal punishment. A lot of parents stopped handing out corporal punishment but failed to replace it with any form of discipline. It was not an uncommon to see kids tearing things off shelves yelling at and smacking their parents while their parents were going “now Jimmy, We don’t do that” shrinking at parents walking by saying their kids, what are you going to do?;The little backpacks with the leashes were a symptom of failed parenting. If you grew up in this time in a very conservative area you might not have experienced this yourself, as giving timeouts, redirecting, and not beating your kids as a relatively progressive ideal and when it started it was actively disparaged by conservatives.
In the '80s and earlier, corporal punishment was regular and expected. There was a push in the '90s to stop the corporal punishment.
Corporeal punishment was outlawed in Denmark by 1997, but was definitely frowned upon much earlier than that. My grandparent’s generation - born in the 1920s and 1930s - was likely the last generation where it was commonly used.
I mean, our kids can be little brats as well - and our kids are also prone to run off and do dumb stuff, but apparently we handle it differently. And I am fairly certain that my initial reaction - that it’s dehumanizing and humiliating - is how it comes off to almost all Nordic parents.
No, I’m explaining the timing. We went from it being acceptable to not doing it in a very short period of time. Delicious came out because parents couldn’t work out any way to control their kids but a physical means.
I’m well aware that Nordic countries treat their kids with a lot more dignity and freedom than the rest of the world, some might even say to their own detriment.
One of my co-workers expatriated to Sweden for a few years. There were tweens just hopping on the bus and going to the museum miles away. But I get the feeling that one could trust the average Swede would prevent harm to a child from a pedophile.
Leashes in the US were a symptom of a brisk change in society with relatively little information on how to perform it. They definitely existed.
One of my co-workers expatriated to Sweden for a few years. There were tweens just hopping on the bus and going to the museum miles away. But I get the feeling that one could trust the average Swede would prevent harm to a child from a pedophile.
In contrast to what many people think, Nordic people are fairly strict with what kids are allowed to do when they are small. We spend a lot of time and effort to ensure that kids are well behaved and can be trusted and don’t act out when they are small, and then, gradually, they are allowed more freedom as they grow older. By the time they’re young teenagers we generally feel like they’ve demonstrated that they can be trusted and they are often allowed to bike or take the bus around town and live with a lot more freedom.
Maybe you’re thinking “Duh, that’s how everyone does it!”, but the reason I mention it is that I’ve experienced that many cultures do it differenty; when the kids are young they are allowed a lot of freedom and very little responsibility, then as they grow older their parents will restrict them more and more. It’s pretty much the opposite of the Nordic approach.
We’re veering off course (or I am, at least), but I find the differences in parenting across cultures very fascinating.
One commenter said that the leashes are for safe toddler independence, not control, and I guess I can see that. It makes sense, even if it would be cultural taboo in my part of the world.
I’m 53 and have seen them used on different continents. My mom used one on me in Europe when we visited when I was two years old. You are completely wrong on all fronts with your comment. Have a good day.
Your American mum bringing a leash over and using it on you somewhere in Europe 51 years ago hardly makes me wrong on all fronts.
Funny you would assume I’m American. You are still wrong on all fronts.
Lemmy, like reddit, skews American and you’re referring to Europe as well, Europe, which tells me you’re not European. You’re welcome to correct me, of course.
Even if you’ve seen leashes on all continents, they’re definitely super rare and not common now. If you decide to be informative instead of assertive you are welcome to educate me on your experiences and expand on which fronts exactly I am wrong and why.
I see no need to waste my time explaining anything to a closed-minded person. Good day.
Thank you for not contributing with anything meaningful to the conversation, I guess!
People are alluding to it, but not attributing the blame correctly: the “need” to leash kids is yet another negative consequence of car-dependent urban design.
The fuck are you on about? Have you never had a kid disappear on you in a mall? There’s no cars there
I was a leash kid
Tell us about how it molded your personality
I don’t remember it at all. I have ADHD which may be related to why they got me a leash.
I’ve always felt weird about parents who have those backpack leashes for their kids, but now that I’ve been living next to my in-laws for a year, who have 8 children, I understand some of them.
I refuse to take some their kids anywhere unless one of them is with my wife and I.
One would absolutely go sprinting full speed away and hide from us just because he thinks it’s hilarious.
Two would wander off because they saw something shiny and their brains are like an etch-a-sketches where every time a new thought enters, the old one has to get wiped away.
One would do the exact opposite of anything we say just because he figures he can.
And three others would absolutely just wander off, not because they want to but just because kids aren’t always the best at spatial awareness and simply get too far away. And would be terrified if they noticed their adults were nowhere in sight.
You lost a kid. That’s only 7
