Babylove, can you re-read what you just wrote, please? “…afraid to your bones” ? That’s a panic attack. It doesn’t have to be like the movies where you fall down, hyperventilating. I come from an abusive home too, so I have a pretty good idea of who told you you have to be small, but you don’t have to minimize your experiences or silence your struggles! I’m just a stranger on the internet, so take my opinion w a grain of salt, or just throw it right away if you want. You deserve to be understood and respected.
Hope you have a calm and peaceful day xoxo
I just listened to an old episode of the Slowdown, a poetry podcast. I’ll link it. The host, before they even get to the poem, always does a little monologue, and in this episode, she talks about her journaling habits. I also struggle with keeping a daily log, I always feel like I’m not “doing it right” or like it sounds dumb or ingenuine when I read it later, but she described her way, and I’m gonna try it. You might like it too!
https://www.slowdownshow.org/episode/2025/07/23/encore-645-its-930am-ive-ran-four-miles-cried-four-times-eaten-two-chicken-sandwiches
I’m posting this for the host’s discussion pre-poem, but the poem is great too!
Have a delicious day and good luck journaling xoxo