It’s like when children grab the toys of others. They don’t want to play with the toy, the fact of the toy being possessed is what makes the toy desirable. The grass is always married on the other side of the fence.

“Yes, I work in… Finance something. How much do I make? I don’t even know if you’re good or bad yet.”

Finally, the freedom to have sick plane crashes thanks to deregulation 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🦅🦅🦅💥💥💥

wait I actually get that

Ha, I can read 50% of this meme

I believe I am more confused than if I could read none

I was gonna go for Dolphewer (dolphin + fewer as fewer sounds like Führer)

They make the Transforming noise ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

when yo girl asks u to fart in her face 😎

Montreal is far, FAR from good public transit. As soon as you’re outside of the core central area of the city, a 20 minute drive turns to a 1 or 1.5 hour trip. It takes me 8 minutes to drive to work, 12 to bike, and 30 to take the bus.

Even if you’re in the city, certain routes take 45 minutes via the subway instead of just 20 by car (parking is still a nightmare though.)

I’ve only ever taken public transit in Montreal, Toronto, New York City, and Paris. Paris is pretty damn decent, and I didn’t have any incidents in Toronto. NYC was pretty confusing sometimes. Montreal is absolutely abysmal though compared to the other 3.

Of course, that’s just my opinion, you’d much rather hear from people who live these other cities.

Assy McGee

Man I can’t keep up with all the new music stars’ names

Fun fact, if you copy something a person does, you’re mocking them. But if you reword what they’re saying and throw it back to them, you’re intellectually deepening the conversation 🧠🧠🧠

real and wholesome :’)

I just rub her left labia for two minutes then ask her if she came

༼ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ༽ ⌐■-■ Mission accomplished ᕕ༼⌐■-■༽ᕗ

Fake: I didn’t vote in this pole

Gay: I didn’t “vote” on this pole ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

“But I’m just an actor!”

“Can you play dead?”

bang

Fuck I miss that show

Right? Like just sit in my lap and pee a little like a normal person

(っ◔◡◔)っ

The original but ultimately rejected title from Beastie Boys’ smash hit

(. )( .)