You don’t. Trying anyway and risking being a creep is what will make some women hate you and others love you. This is how assortative matching works. But if everything you say is inoffensive to everyone, then you will always be boring and will therefore never line up dates.
Like, this is Lemmy, so I’ll use this example. If you put the fact that you are a communist in your datinf profile, the vast majority of women will think that is super cringy edgelord shit, and you’re an idiot. (And I cannot overstate this - the vast, vast majority of women). But some women will think “omg, yesss!!! Finally a guy who gets it!!”.
Similarly, if you put “Looking for someone to tie up in the bedroom”, some women (fewer than the number who think communism is cringe, though) will call you a psycho rapist. But the rope bunnies out there will think “omg, yessss!!! Tie me up, daddy!!”
I see most profiles trying to be all things to all people.
You describe “success” well. When I was younger I played the game of averages. If nine girls thought I was a creep but the tenth was impressed that was fine. I would get a phone number most nights which resulted in a date.
But eventually this felt degrading for all concerned (especially for the nine) and it wasn’t leading to high quality dates. I finally saw simply getting laid as an inane goal.
You don’t. Trying anyway and risking being a creep is what will make some women hate you and others love you. This is how assortative matching works. But if everything you say is inoffensive to everyone, then you will always be boring and will therefore never line up dates.
Like, this is Lemmy, so I’ll use this example. If you put the fact that you are a communist in your datinf profile, the vast majority of women will think that is super cringy edgelord shit, and you’re an idiot. (And I cannot overstate this - the vast, vast majority of women). But some women will think “omg, yesss!!! Finally a guy who gets it!!”.
Similarly, if you put “Looking for someone to tie up in the bedroom”, some women (fewer than the number who think communism is cringe, though) will call you a psycho rapist. But the rope bunnies out there will think “omg, yessss!!! Tie me up, daddy!!”
I see most profiles trying to be all things to all people.
You describe “success” well. When I was younger I played the game of averages. If nine girls thought I was a creep but the tenth was impressed that was fine. I would get a phone number most nights which resulted in a date.
But eventually this felt degrading for all concerned (especially for the nine) and it wasn’t leading to high quality dates. I finally saw simply getting laid as an inane goal.