“Do you wanna fuck her?”
“How many times do I have to explain what pansexuality is? I wanna fuck everyone, everywhere, alll the time!”
Having only male friends is a red flag.
irl I’m a woman and I only have male friends… Okay I have ONE Female friend and I rarely see her anymore. I’m not avoiding her or anything, our paths just drifted apart.
What about having no friends at all?
It’s only a red flag every 28 days.
…dude…
All other days they are flying a black flag.
Yarrr
What happens if he says yes? Then you are trapped alone with him. Seems worse lol
Then you bail
you bail either way
Im sorry if its misogynistic but I dont really want a woman nobody else wants to fuck.
Like… if the consensus is “Naaaaaah” theres probably a really good reason.
The fact that you’re basing your desire on anyone else’s opinions at all means you are not based. Next.
The fact that you don’t take other people’s opinions into account for desire may suggest you lack Theory of Mind. You should get that looked into. Other people’s dispositions toward something are one of the best heuristics available for quickly learning about that thing.
the sooner humanity realises some things you like as an individual others don’t like, the sooner we can all start enjoying life much much more. far too many people don’t have fun because they think it’ll make them look bad, and that’s so sad
do what you want to do, be who you want to be, be proud of being weird - because we are all fucking weird - and don’t worry about what other people think… just be you and enjoy it
humanity knows this. That’s why I said heuristic. There’s not enough time to figure everything out by ourselves, that’s why we operate well as a team.
And that’s why I just cut contact with all people in my life every time I get a partner, to be respectful. Haven’t talked to my grandpa in years but what can you do?
I feel like there is a difference between finding someone attractive enough to entertain the idea of having sex with them and starting/maintaining a friendship for the sole purpose of keeping open the possibility of sex in the future when they can exploit a vulnerability. If a friend treats everyone of his/her friends roughly equal, I see no harm. However, „friends“ that bend over backwards, get overly touchy and so on with the people in a committed relationship they wanna bang and not with people they don’t, I see a problem. Worst case yet that i encountered was a „friend“ that mimicked mannerisms, hobbies and appearances of the partner that „stood in his way“. That’s just plain creepy.
I feel like there’s a difference between the two but judging by this comment section lemmy doesn’t do nuance.
Exactly which nuance is important in this context?
His friends aren’t his friends because they want to fuck his girlfriend. They were his friends before he had a girlfriend.
Her guy friends are only friends with her because they want to fuck her.
Those are completely different things in this small window of context.
Sure, but this small window of context also still indicates that “he”:
- Doesn’t trust her to not cheat
- Wants to control who she can be around
Which sounds pretty toxic imho. Given that, if she wants to respond to toxicity with trolling, it certainly is pretty funny. Which seems to be the main point of the post, and the added nuance doesn’t really undermine that.
I don’t see it that way at all. He can trust her while not trusting the people she associates with.
I’ve had this issue with multiple girlfriends (who all ended up with one of the guys I warned them about). It’s easy to tell when a guy is only being friendly to try to fuck a girl. Pointing that out isn’t controlling in my eyes it’s trying to be protective.
I’ll grant you he shouldn’t have said “stop hanging out with them” but the main point is there if you don’t have the knee jerk reaction to the phrasing.
If the existence of alternatives is a threat to your relationship, your relationship is on borrowed time anyway.
I’ve had this issue with multiple girlfriends (who all ended up with one of the guys I warned them about).
It sounds like you pushed them away to me: These other dudes will have been being nice and friendly to her meanwhile you’re being controlling and untrusting of the very guys who are considerably more fun to be with whilst you’re telling her which of them definitely fancy her, so she’s in if she wants to take a punt on one of them.
I mean, you’re kind of acting like an annoying wing man for her male friends. Why not swap you out?
But, if you trust her, there shouldn’t be a problem, right?
Or is it that you (in this hypothetical situation) don’t truly trust her, otherwise you’d trust her around people you don’t trust.
And that’s okay, just don’t pretend it’s actually trust.
I don’t trust other men to respect boundaries. If another man is only friends with my girlfriend because he wants to fuck her then he’s already the type of man I wouldn’t trust not to make unwanted moves.
She might not reciprocate but that’s not what I’m worried about in this scenario.
She’s right, though. The only friend I ever had who wasn’t creepy with my girlfriends behind my back was gay.
Get better friends!
Oh for sure. Way ahead of you, ditched those guys years ago. Now I just have no friends!
It’s always nice when toxic people pair up. They can just be toxic to each other and leave the rest of us out of it.
